kissess

nanny jane





13th April

2008
Your 2nd birthday  

Always!!!
































Kayden's  Friends




http://paige-leigh.memory-of.com

http://cameron-weadock.memory-of.com

http://keavey-louise-hopper.memory-of.com

http://albie-turner12805.memory-of.com

http://naima-phillipsmaud.memory-of.com

http://elleamae-gleed.memory-of.com

http://kori-hubber.memory-of.com

http://callum-warren.memory-of.com

http://benjamin-stewart.gonetoosoon.co.uk

http://hywel-m-williams.memory-of.com

http://jadyn-snell.memory-of.com

http://kayla-walters.memory-of.com

http://reece-edwards.memory-of.com

http://babydylan-royce-souppouris.memory-of.com


And Kaydens Dear Friends Amelia, Erin and Ely xxx

















Angel Mums

We have shared our tears and our sorrow,
We have given encouragement to each other,
Given hope for a brighter tomorrow,
We share the title of grieving mother.

Some of us lost older daughters or sons,
Who we watched grow over the years,
Some have lost their babies before their lives begun,
But no matter the age , we cry the same tears.

We understand each others pain,
The bond we share is very strong,
With each other there is no need to explain,
The path we walk is hard and long.

Our children brought us together,
They didn't want us on this journey alone,
They knew we needed each other,
To survive the pain of them being gone.

So take my hand my friend,
We may stumble and fall along the way,
But we'll get up and try again,
Because together we can make it day by day.

We can give each other hope,
We'll create a place where we belong,
Together we will find ways to cope,
Because we are Angel Mums and together we are strong!

Judi Walker
(Shane's Mom)
Copyright Dec. 28, 1999
Dedicated to all mums who have lost a child. 




































You are my first thought when I awake and
 my last thought before I sleep .
You're in my dreams and I feel your spirit 
 beside me every moment of the day.














 














      


[








'You are in the arms of Jesus now, and I know that you'll be fine,
But how I wish with all my heart, that those arms could be mine'
































For all those months I held you close
deep inside of me.
I planned your life and dreamed about
the child you'd grow to be
The days went by. I felt you move.
I chose a name for you.
I bought you clothes and fixed your room
it all looked bright and new.
Then all went wrong. The birth was bad.
And you just couldn't live.
You left me there with empty arms.
And all this love to give.
I had one chance to hold you,
to say goodbye to what we shared.
Somehow I felt you would know
how much I really cared.
For I had grown to know you
when you lived inside of me.
And I will always love you.
Though your life will never be.
- Author Unknown - 




















A Child that loses a parent is an orphan,
A Man who loses his wife is a widower,
A Woman who loses her husband is a widow,
There is no name for a parent that loses a child,  
For there are no word to describe the pain.

























Welcome to the club where no-one wants to be
for we all have angels in heaven flying free
and I would just give anything to have them
here with you and me.

We all feel each others greif
and we feel each others pain
we all know the day are angels
grew wings we would never be the same

Our angels our all playing in heaven up above
but we will always show them our forever love
our broken hearts will never fully mend
and each and every day our love to
our beautiful angels we send

Welcome to our club but i wish that you wernt here
but we will all give you a hug and a listening ear
no matter what the time no matter what the day
we are all here for each other to give a hug your way

We all carry on with our angels by our side
they left footprints on our hearts we can never hide
we all understand what sorrow you are going through
for we all belong to the club no-one wants to belong to.














Kayden's Stone in the SANDS memorial garden Lichfield.





          








"Gone Too Soon"
(Sung by Micheal Jackson)

Like A Comet
Blazing 'Cross The Evening Sky
Gone Too Soon

Like A Rainbow
Fading In The Twinkling Of An Eye
Gone Too Soon

Shiny And Sparkly
And Splendidly Bright
Here One Day
Gone One Night

Like The Loss Of Sunlight
On A Cloudy Afternoon
Gone Too Soon

Like A Castle
Built Upon A Sandy Beach
Gone Too Soon

Like A Perfect Flower
That Is Just Beyond Your Reach
Gone Too Soon

Born To Amuse, To Inspire, To Delight
Here One Day
Gone One Night

Like A Sunset
Dying With The Rising Of The Moon
Gone Too Soon

Gone Too Soon 











Of blessings You've given me, Lord,
I thank You each day as I kneel and adore.
Such pain as there is in this earthly life;
Heartaches, sorrow and , O Lord, the strife.
These blur my vision of Your kingdom above
And make me doubt that I've ever known love.
 
It's hard to imagine the plan of Your Hands
When life has me trapped by its many demands.
I worry and fret, I'm plagued by concern
To the point I don't know which way to turn.
 
What is the reason, why am I here?
What am I to be, for those I hold dear?
Will the pain go away if I just understand?
Speak to me, Lord! I'll do all I can.
 
Guide me when I lose Your way,
Guard my tongue in all I say;
Speak to me, Lord! I need much more
So I don't lose Your way, I humbly implore.
And while I'm so bold, each one of the needs
Of family and friends, grant them, Lord, please!

  








Touched by Angels

We are touched by angels
And walk where angels tread,
They will guide us,
walk beside us
through the days ahead.
In the hours of darkness,
When our dreams have flown,
They bring hope
and gentle healing,
we are not alone.
In our times of doubting,
Still they understand,
And forever touched by
angels,
We walk hand in hand.


























I Thought Of You

I thought of you with love today, but that is nothing new.
I thought about you yesterday, and the day before that, too.
I think of you in silence, I often say your name,
But all I have is memories and your picture in a frame.

Your memory is my keepsake, with which I'll never part.
God has you in his keeping, I have you in my heart.
I shed tears for what might have been, a million times I've cried.
If love alone could have saved you, you never would have died.

In life I loved you dearly, in death I love you still,
In my heart you hold a place no one could ever fill.
It broke my heart to lose you, but you didn't go alone,
For part of me went with you, the day God took you home.

author unknown 

























A Father's Grief

It must be very difficult
To be a man in grief,
Since "men don't cry" and "men are strong"
No tears can bring relief.

It must be very difficult
To stand up to the test
And field calls and visitors
So she can get some rest.

They always ask if she's all right
And what she's going through,
But seldom take his hand and ask,
"My friend, but how are you?"

He hears her crying in the night
And thinks his heart will break.
He dries her tears and comforts her,
But "stays strong" for her sake.

It must be very difficult
To start each day anew
And try to be so very brave--
He lost his baby too. 













Mommy, When I Went To Heaven~ 

Mommy, when I went to heaven,
I took part of your heart.
Just so you will always remember me,
And know we will never be apart.

Mommy, when I went to heaven,
I was not alone.
They were waiting there for me,
The day the Lord took me home.

Mommy, when I went to heaven,
I seen you crying down below.
I tried to touch you,
And let you know I love you so.

Mommy, when I went to heaven,
I know you didn't want me to go.
So the Lord let's me come back once & awhile,
I kiss you just to let you know.

Mommy, when I went to heaven,
They promised you would feel my touch.
I am here for you, mommy,
I miss & love you so much....

~ Author Unknown ~















If Roses Grow In Heaven

If roses grow in heaven
Lord,please pick a bunch for me
Place them in my sons arms
And tell him they're from me

Tell him that i love him,
And when he turns to smile
Place a kiss upon his cheek
And hold him for a while.

Because remembering him is everything
I do it everyday
For there is an aching in my heart that will never go away.
















A Gift
An Angel was sent from Heaven above
A special one that would bring much love
God knew that this precious life would be short
So he looked around for a tender heart.

He made his choice and the gift was sent
In what seemed like a moment, the angel went
Leaving treasured memories and a heart full of pain
A void, an abyss, tears flowed like rain
But.........

Wait a moment, I wish you could see
The wonderful thing thats happened to me
Jesus was waiting, His arms opened wide
And he and his angels brought me inside
Such a beautiful place I cannot describe
A new home from the moment I died.

I'll wait here for you, so dry up your tears
And go bravely on with your life free from fears
Know that Gods near you to help and to guide
He'll never desert you, he's there by your side
So speak to him daily from inside your heart
And let him assure you, we're never apart.























My Dad is a Survivor

My dad is a survivor too
which is no surprise to me.
He's always been like a lighthouse
that helps you cross a stormy sea.

But, I walk with my dad each day
to lift him when he's down.
I wipe the tears he hides from others;
He cries when no one's around.

I watch him sit up late at night
with my picture in his hand.
He cries as he tries to grieve alone,
and wishes he could understand.

My dad is like a tower of strength.
He's the greatest of them all!
But, there are times when he needs to cry...
Please be there when he falls.

Hold his hand or pat his shoulder...
And tell him it's okay.
Be his strength when he's sad,
Help him mourn in his own way.

Now, as I watch over my precious dad
from the Heavens up above...
I'm so proud that he's a survivor...
And, I can still feel his love. 











What is a Dad?

God took the strength of a mountain, 
The majesty of a tree,
The warmth of a summer sun,
The calm of a quiet sea,

The generous soul of nature,
The comforting arm of night,
The wisdom of the ages,
The power of the eagle's flight,

The joy of a morning in spring,
The faith of a mustard seed,
The patience of eternity,
The depth of a family need,

Then God combined these qualities,
When there was nothing more to add,
He knew His masterpiece was complete,
And so,
He called it ... Dad

Author is unknown













The Cord

We are connected,
My daughter and I, by
An invisible cord
Not seen by the eye.
It's not like the cord
That connects us 'til birth
This cord can't be seen
By any on earth.
This cord does it's work
Right from the start.
It binds us together
Attached to my heart.
I know it's there,
Tho no one can see
This invisible cord
From my daughter to me.
The strength of this cord
Is hard to describe
It can't be destroyed,
It can't be denied.
It's stronger than any cord
One could create
It withstands the test
Can hold any weight.
And though you're gone
Though you're not here with me,
The cord is still there
Though no one can see.
It pulls at my heart,
I am bruised...I am sore,
But this cord is my lifeline
As never before.
I am thankful that God
Connects us this way
A mother and child
Death can't take it away!
- Unknown












A Lament for My Baby


I never got to hear you laugh
you never saw me cry
didnt get a chance to say "Hello"
you never said "Goodbye"
I didn't think that I could feel
so sad, lost and forlorn.
I never knew God chose his Angels
before some of them were born.
Your life was short yet special
I shared it all exclusively
I felt you breathe, I felt you kick.
You were alive inside of me.
Every baby is an Angel
and every angel is divine
God needed one in heaven
He came down and took mine
And although we are not together
we're not really apart
for you'll always occupy a space
deep within my heart.
Time has begun to ease my pain
It's only some days now I cry.
When I wish I could have said "Hello"
and heard you say "Goodbye"
~Author Unknown 











Kayden Kayden its a lovely day, 

Kayden Kayden are you coming out to play, 

Go and put your nappy on 

Tell God you won't be long, 

Cause....... 

Mommy is waiting round the 

corner.


















My Mummy

My Mum is a survivor, or so I've heard it said.
But I hear her crying at night when all others are in bed.
I watch her lay awake at night and go to hold her hand.
She doesn't know I'm with her to help her understand.
But like the sands on the beach that never wash away...
I watch over my surviving Mum, who thinks of me each day.
She wears a smile for others...a smile of disguise.
But through Heaven's door I see tears flowing from her eyes.
My Mum tries to cope with death to keep my memory alive.
But anyone who knows her knows it is her way to survive.
As I watch over my surviving Mum...through Heaven's open door,
I try to tell her that angels protect me forever more.
But I know that doesn't help her or ease the burden she bears.
So if you get a chance, go visit her...And show her that you care.
For no matter what she says...no matter what she feels.
My surviving Mum has a broken heart that time won't ever heal










Although you cannot see me
Know that I am near
You will always be my Mummy
Though my body is not here
My heart is wrapped around you
As yours is too with mine
For the love we have between us
Will not be lost in time.














A N G E L UNAWARE

Oh the longing we both had
to be a mommy and a dad
We put our hopes and dreams in you
He hoped for pink, I dreamed of blue
But for you God had a different plan
One we may never understand

We were visited by an angel
Though we didn't know it then
You were the answer to our prayer
Our Angel Unaware

We barely got to say hello
Before we had to let you go
God breathed your name and called you home
So briefy here, so quickly gone
But in the stillness of the night
My empty arms still hold you tight

We were visited by an angel
Though we didn't know it then
You were the answer to our prayer
Our Angel Unaware








A Face In The Clouds

I looked towards the clouds today
and for a moment saw your face
And wondered just where you have gone
with a hope it's a better place

Did you show yourself to me today
to tell me you're alright?
Or was it just a daydream
playing tricks upon my sight

Then I thought of when you left
you did not say a word
We never said "goodbye" but
in our hearts, your good-bye was heard

You have changed our lives forever
Your time here not in vain
and hope you know we always wanted
to keep you safe from pain

We will always feel the void inside
because you are not here
But each new thought you send our way
lets us know you're always near

So until our journey nears it's end
And we hear the angels sing
We'll face each new day as it comes
and live off the love you bring
~Author Unknown~







AN ANGEL NEVER DIES

Don’t let them say I wasn’t born

That something stopped my heart

I felt each tender squeeze you gave,

I’ve loved you from the start

Although my body cant hold.

It doesn’t mean I am gone,

This world was worthy, not, of me,

God chose that I move on

I know the pain that drowns your soul,

What you are forced to face,

You have my word, I’ll fill you arms,

Someday we will embrace,

You’ll hear that it was “meant to be,

God doesn’t make mistakes”,

But that wont soften your worst blow,

Or make your heart not ache,

I’m watching over all you ,

Another child you’ll bear,

Believe me when I say to you,

That I am always there

There’ll come a time, I promise you,

When you will hold my hand,

Stroke my face and kiss my lips,

And then you’ll understand

Although I’ve never breathed your air,

Or gazed into your eyes,

That doesn’t mean I never “was”

An angel never dies….

~Unknown Author~












What is a Grandma?

She takes you in her arms
snuggles you in
lets you do the things
That mummy and daddy say NO to
or does she ?
This one
holds you in her heart
can only tell your photo
how much YOU are loved
kisses it goodnight
and
good morning
So What is a grandma ?
How can I be one if you are not here with me
Oh but you are !
Always
You live inside my soul
My love keeps you safe
Until we meet again
One Day
Some Day
So what is a Grandma

I AM .............. xxxxxxxxxxx


















Am I a Mummy?

Can you be a mother if you don’t have a baby ?
Am I a mummy – I don’t know, maybe ?
I know I wasn’t “right” for most of last year
My stomach grew til it stuck right out here !
My feet and my ankles swelled like balloons
I must have looked like some kind of cartoon !
We bought all those things – bottles and bibs,
Babygros, bath, carseat and cribs,
Dummies and hats, scratch mitts and toys,
Beige everywhere for a girl or a boy,
Bedding, a snowsuit, wipes and milk too
A room “stuffed with stuff” – all waiting for you
Four weeks to go, people ask “are you scared?”
“Is the nursery ready - is everything prepared ?”
Others who have got pregnant since you
Ask your advice on the things they should do
All’s going smoothly and you gaze at scan pics
Then there’s that strange sensation – when you stop feeling kicks
Afterwards you try desperately to remember, to know
The exact moment it happened, when they had to “go”
There’s that awful scan, and the “too-quiet” tone
Then the midwife’s gone, and you’re left alone
You go in the Maternity Unit just the same
Give birth like everyone – the pushing, the pain
But its right about then that things fall apart
You leave hospital with no baby, just a broken heart
Maybe like us you’re shown out the back way
Like that helps you forget what happened that day
You arrive back home like you’ve just had an op
You had a “condition” and now it has stopped
Like an in-growing toenail or a kidney stone
You have it removed and you’re packed back off home
Someone shuts the nursery door
The stuff looks ridiculous – what’d you buy all that for ?
And so you sit there with nothing to do
Flowers and cards start arriving round you
You go through the funeral because you have to
It’s not like it’s something you ever wanted to do
Information on christenings, registrars and more
That you had sent for not three weeks before,
Lies pointless and useless on the dining room table
You’ll sort it all out, when you are able
In the days after the funeral, when it finally sinks in
It’s no joke or trick – there’s no way you can win
Your baby is dead, it’s over, the end
“You can start again now” says some well-meaning friend
It’s like taking part in a 100 metre dash
You cross the line & you’re a winner – a medal, a sash
But if you don’t finish, you’re just an “also-ran”
“You’ll be fine next time” says some nice doctor man
Pass the finish line and you’re officially a mother
With a living baby as prize, just like all the others
Don’t finish the race and no-one knows what to say
All they talk about is running one again another day
No-one says the “M” word or applies it to you
Like you haven’t quite earned the right for it to
You don’t have a baby – you failed at the last post
So you’re not a mother – and what hurts the most ?
Losing your baby because Fate throws a turn
Or losing the recognition you still should have earned ?
Those people who got pregnant after you
Are now “overtaking” and there’s nothing you can do
They’re having their babies and it all seems so easy
Some even smaller than yours – you think “how can that be ?”
That their babies survive and somehow yours don’t
You want to say congratulations – but part of you won’t
They display all the celebration cards they’ve been sent
Saying how lovely that they are now proud parents
“So are we” you shout “I had a baby – its the truth !”
So where is it now – where’s your actual proof ?
Are you changing, bathing, feeding alright ?
Are you being kept awake with the crying at night ?
Can you show grandparents & friends more than a photograph ?
Can we hear your baby gurgle and giggle and laugh ?
Are you doing these jobs that society defines as a mother ?
“Well no” you reply - but there are other
Ways I try to keep my baby alive
With photos and poems their memory thrives
Dedications and posts on the SANDS website
Always telling them hello and goodnight
And I know I only ever kiss a plaque
On a box of ashes that can’t kiss me back
But I do try and be a good mummy in name
“That’s lovely” they say, “but it’s not quite the same….”
“It’ll all work out next time” they say
“You’ll get a “proper” baby – be a real mummy that day…”
So my question to the world, if I don’t have a baby
Is am I a mummy – yes, no, maybe ??
You see I think the title is earned with love
Whether down on earth or sleeping above
And I beg to argue that us angel mothers
Love our children unlike any others
We don’t have all the new baby celebration
But we never lose our temper or cry in frustration
We think of them every minute, every day
We don’t give them to someone so we get a break
Our love and devotion is magnified tenfold
Just because we don’t have a baby to hold
So I am going to say I’m a mother with pride
My baby was beautiful, I’ve nothing to hide
I’m sure I’ll have an “earth” baby one day
But I’m the mother of an angel baby today
So ask me now if I’m a mother and I’ll tell you for sure
I’m a true mummy now – and forever more









"Love and miss you my precious Angels."












I Hurt

I said, God I hurt
And God said, I know

I said, I cry a lot
And God said, that's why I gave you tears

I said, life is so hard
And God said, that's why I gave you loved ones

I said, but my loved one died!
And God said, so did mine!

I said, it's such a great loss!
And God said, I saw mine nailed to a cross!

I said, but your loved one lives!
And God said, so does yours!

I said, where is he now?
And God said, my son is by my side
And yours is in my arms. 












Don't think of him as gone away
His journey's just begun
Life holds so many facets
Earth is only one

Just think of him as resting
From the sorrows and the tears
In a place of warmth and comfort
Where there are no days and years

Think how he must be wishing
That he could know today
How nothing but our sadness
Can really pass away

And think of him as living
In the hearts of those he touched
For nothing loved is ever lost
And he was loved so much

By Ellen Brenneman 












My silent child
Our precious baby
Close to my heart
I'll keep you with me

An important job
God has for you
There's love to give
And work to do

He needs an angel
Strong but small
To shine light on many
And give love to all

Before you go
I give you this
All my heart
And one last kiss 









Daddy please don’t look so sad
Mummy don’t you cry
I am in the arms of Jesus
And he sings me lullabies
You see I am a special child
I'm needed up above
For I am the special gift you gave God
A product of your love
I’ll always be with you
So watch the sky at night
Find the brightest star that's gleaming
That's my halo brilliant light
You'll see me in the morning frost
The mist upon your window pane
When you feel a little breeze
From a gentle wind that blows
That's me-for I'll be there
A kiss upon your nose
When you see a child playing
And your heart feels a little tug
That's me you see
I'll be there giving your heart a hug
So daddy please don't look so sad
Mummy don't you cry
I am in the arms of Jesus and he sings me Lullabies